Webster's on-line Dictionary definition on Special:

1 : distinguished by some unusual quality; especially : being in some way superior
2 : held in particular esteem (a special friend)
3 a : readily distinguishable from others of the same category : UNIQUE b : of, relating to, or constituting a species : SPECIFIC
4 : being other than the usual : ADDITIONAL, EXTRA
5 : designed for a particular purpose or occasion

We know what the definition of a man is so I won't include it.

The rest of this document I will attempt to provide as much information of the type of man I am wanting to spend the rest of my life with. Please understand that I'm not trying to be picky... I'm just trying to be real. I don't want to get involved in a relationship with a man if the relationship isn't going to last for the rest of our lives. My next commitment will be for life. I will not consider it temporary. Also, there are always the exceptions to the rules. I have a tendency to fall in love not based on outside characterists but what is on the inside.

Age:
I'm 36, but because of my life experiences I feel I'm about six years older. I simply have a hard time relating to men who are close to my age or younger. At the same time, I will not date nor consider marrying a man who is close to my mother's age. Therefore, my age preference is 40 to 50.

Looks:
I'm 5'5". Dark brown hair with touches of grey. My eyes are a deep brown. My skin tone is olive and I tan very easily in the summer. I'm not a 10. I'm somewhere between average and an eight. With that in mind... the men I'm most attracted to have the following looks... Between 5'9" to 6'1". No more than 30 pounds under or over weight. I prefer brown hair and love touches of grey. I like to look into a man's eyes when they are either deep blue, dark hazel, or deep brown. I like a man who doesn't burn easily and who has skin tone similar to mine, but please no sun lovers. I don't tan on purpose... my tan is from driving and working in the yard. No long hair please. My hair is either shoulder length or longer, so please... keep your's short. I don't really care for beards. I shave my legs so please shave your face. The man of my dreams would be considered average to an eight on a scale of 1 to 10.

Previous marital history:
I have been seperated/divorce since December of 1985. I have two boys from that marriage, and one other son. All three of the boys lives with me. I am their custodial parent. I find it easier to relate to the man I'm with if he has been married before and/or has at least one child from a previous relationship. It is important for the man I'm with to understand my situation of being a single parent and divorced. I will not date a man who feels he doesn't have to support his child financially, emotionally, or spiritually. So please... only those who are serious about being a parent. One other request that I have... please do not compare me to your previous girl friends/wives. I am not them... just like you are not my ex-husband. And if you are not over your previous relationship, please do not start or attempt to start a relationship with me... I am not here for you to be on the re-bound. I want a man who is serious about a relationship only... I do not play games.

Previous criminal history:
As much as I believe in giving people chances in life... I do not want someone in my life that has a criminal history.

Music
I listen to a wide variety of music... from Classical to Rock. I don't like Rap, and not really into Jazz or Country. I don't mind some Jazz and Country, I just don't listen to it that much. I primarily listen to the rock-n-roll of the 60's, 70's, and some 80's. I believe music is food for the soul... and I sing to it as well as dance to it. My special man would enjoy the same types of music as I... he would enjoy watching me dance and join in :-) ... I play the keyboard and currently have a small electric Midi keyboard. I would like to buy a full size electric piano that can record in Midi format. It would be very important to me if that special man understands how important music is to me...

Computers
We won't go there... Actually I find working around computers, the internet, and servers... well... exciting. It would be a dream come true if the special man in my life finds it just as exciting as I do.

Humor
A must! I love humor. I get a big kick out of people who send me jokes during the day... so send them if you have them :-) ... What I love the best: Sexual, Political, and Computer related. I like to tease and be teased...

Colors
Hmmm.... well... as long as you are not so stuck on one color that everything must be that color... then that will be great! I have a wide variety of colors represented in my home, and I find them to be an important part of everyday living.

Movies
I enjoy many different types of movies but martial arts. I would rather see either Drama like "Saving Private Ryan" or adventure type...

Children
Ideally the man I would find (or finds me) would already have children and doesn't want anymore. I've been a step-mother before and know how important it is to being a parent to a child. Even if I'm not the biological parent. I would want the man I fall in love with to be a man who wants to be a father and respects that role in society and at home. It would be a dream come true if a father would play basketball, football, or other sports with my three boys while I cook dinner... a dream. A dream for them as well as for me. My oldest two don't have a father involved in their lives and haven't since 1986. The youngest has an active father. It's a tough role to play but fatherhood matters a lot to me.

Hobbies
There isn't many hobbies that I don't like. Primarily I'm not a believer in owning lots of guns in the home. If there is any hobbies which I wouldn't feel good about, gun owning is one. A man who enjoys sports is just perfect to me... as long as he doesn't mind his wife enjoying them to. I love basketball, and watch football from time to time. It wouldn't bother me to give up the TV to my husband to watch sports... as long as it doesn't get in the way of going places (like hiking).

Drinking
No heavy drinking. I don't drink a lot, but do drink.

Drugs
Simple... no drugs.

Cars/Trucks/Transportation
Hmmm... I drive a Light Tundra (greenish-grey) 2003 Mazda Tribute ES-V6. I'm not totally concerned with the car the my special man would drive, but I don't want him to be driving something that looks like its on it's last leg. I prefer cars that are blue, white, silver, or green. I'm not attracted to red cars, fancy cars, or sports cars. I am attracted to decent cars that get good gas milage, has good handling, and that has some get up and go. I don't speed in town, but do go a bit fast on the Interestate and Highways. so please, no speeding in my neighborhood.

Education
Does education matter to me? Yes. But if that special man doesn't have a degree, that doesn't matter to me. What counts is where he is at now... not what he did twenty years ago.

Employment
Does my special man need to have a high paying job? No. All I ask for is stability. I don't want to get involved with someone who jumps from job to job every couple of years. Professions that I find attractive... engineering, anything to do with computers and the Internet, construction, politics, medicine, police enforcement or other community type involvement, etc... What I'm not attracted to... a man who doesn't work or has no real desire to work. Work is important to me... not necessarily for the pay, but for the time you spend with other people. I am not looking for a free ride. I do plan on continuing to work my full-time job. I enjoy it, it gets me out of the house, and I get to do something where I feel I'm making a difference in somebody's life.

Where do you live?!?
I'm not interested in a LDR. I'm not going to move either. I have family and other reasons to stay where I am at. It a man become interested in me that doesn't live close he will need to move closer to me, because I'm not moving. I would perfer if the man I end up dating and getting to know live in the same city as me or close enough where he can commute to work if necessary. So please don't expect me to pack up my kids and move across country to go and live with him.

General Touchy-Feely stuff
Okay... this is a big one. I like to touch people. That special man must like to be touched. Likewise, I like to be touched. It is a way for a man to let me know he is thinking of me, cares for me, and loves me. I am at my best when I receive a hug in the morning and when I get home. I also like it when a man sneaks up from behind me just to give me a hug. I like to be held while watching TV and sleeping at night. Closeness is very important to me.

Just having fun
There are many activities I enjoy doing. I find it most pleasing when the man I'm with just plays with me as if we are a couple of children. I have a bag of foam balls in my house that I allow the boys to throw at each other just to have fun. It would be wonderful to find a man who wouldn't mind joining in on that type of activity.

Attitude towards marriage
Marriage is very important to me. I highly respect marriage and I don't want to go into a marriage without close consideration of both myself and the man that I love. My next marriage will be for life, and life is a long time. The man in my life must have the same attitude as I. He must respect our marriage. There are only a few reasons why I would ever leave a marriage... cheating, crime, drugs, and violence. I don't cheat, I don't break the law, I don't do drugs, and I'm not violent. I will promise to love my husband to the best of my ability for the rest of my life. I ask the same out of my husband. Yes, in all marriages there are problems. I do expect that. There isn't much that I can't work through... I'm a very stubborn person. When I want something to work... I won't walk away. That is a promise I will make to my husband & to God.

 

More characteristics I find important and they are based on my three sons... :-)

Like my oldest son... who I like to tease. He always laughs when I tease him. He never gets upset. He is legally an adult now and his hormones are running wild, it's a blast to be a parent of a son like my oldest. He shows self-control and respects woman. Once in a while he'll come up to me and give me a big hug and kiss... in public!

Like my middle son who is the kindest person you can meet. He is always a big help and thinks about children. He is the best big brother any small kid could have. He wants to help others. And always puts himself second without jeopardizing his own time. He will tuck in my youngest as if he was his father. One day he will make a very good and loving father.

Like my youngest... dear dear boo-boo bear... He truly loves his mommy. He calls himself my little helper, and makes sure that he always helps me somehow when I get home from work. He is always giving me hugs and kisses. He thinks the world of me, and I think the world of him.

Other characteristics I find important...
A man who is a leader... A man who enjoys being a father. A bit on the self-centered side. A man who can debate. A man when he wraps his arms around me will make me feel like I'm wrapped in a blanket, he'll consume me. A man who likes to touch... I like to touch, and like to be touched.

Just show me a man who knows himself well enough to know his limits. Show to me that he is a good leader. Show me that he will guide and not control. Show me that he listens, plays, loves, and I will know that man is special. I will hold a man dear to my heart if he has the capacity to hold me dear to his heart. Take me by the hand and just show me.

Do I expect to find that special man on the Net? No. I have provided this information for those who are curious about me... that's all. If you want to email me, then do... I am always glad to be pen-pals... :-)

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